How do we help our kids fall in love with Jesus and live as fully activated disciples? 🤔 Let’s dive into it together this Sunday!
🌟 What’s one step we can take to make Jesus the defining factor in our families? Tune in to find out!
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OPENING ILLUSTRATION:
Parenting is the craziest, toughest thing I’ve ever done, amen!
I’m honestly not sure how Peter, our oldest survived. I think 3 separate times when I was feeding him as a baby, I would throw him up on my shoulder to burp him, not realizing I was up against a wall, and would smack his head – one time it was on the corner of a post and he literally had a sunken in line on his head with swelling all around it. One time, he would not stay in his bed and I was done with it. I was like, “Buddy, you’re gonna stay in your bed tonight” I laid by his bed all night long with my hand on his back and forced him to stay in bed. The next day, Jenni took him to the doctor and we found out he had a raging ear infection. Oh my gosh, I felt like such a terrible dad. I just didn’t know…
I’d say most parenting could be summed up by looking back and saying, “I just didn’t know…”
b
I didn’t know making jokes about someone your kid is interested in would shut them down from talking to you about that stuff
I didn’t know I’d have to spend every waking moment being judge and jury – I one time created a spreadsheet that I could put my kid’s problems into, fill in a bunch of data and it would tell me what they got to do…
The challenge in parenting is every day is a challenge…
… and most of them are challenges you’ve never faced before.
ILLUSTRATION:
I remember one of my biggest worries when we had kids was how I would help them fall in love with Jesus. I had known so many people who grew up in the church and grew up as Christians who just had no fire in their bones about Jesus. My worry was that I would fall in love with Jesus from the life I came out of and have kids who were just lukewarm at best in their faith. What do you do with that? Â
How do you help your kids fall in love with Jesus in a way that moves them to follow Him and be fully activated Disciples of Jesus?
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There is a two-ingredient recipe to parenting in a way that produces kids who love and live for Jesus:
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-Two parts, your child being sensitive to what God is doing and allowing/inviting Him into their life (you can influence this, but you have no control)
-One part, is parents leading their child to know Jesus in a way that works. (You have control over this and it will influence the other)
b
What is the way that works?
Deuteronomy 6:4-9
4 Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.
Moses starts out with a declaration of who God is and reminds these people to love God with every part of their being…
-he’s giving us a model, watch…
6 These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
ILLUSTRATION:
Moses is telling them what to do, right… The Israelites took this really serious. When I was in Israel, every door when you walk through it has this little container on the doorpost – inside the container is a scroll with scripture on it. Orthodox jews and in Jesus’ day would wear jewelry on their foreheads and wrists called phylacteries that had scrolls of scripture in them..
Moses isn’t giving fashion advice when he says to tie the commands on their bodies and write them on their property. Moses is actually telling them…
b
To turn every activity into an object lesson about God and His goodness.
This is the way that works!
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Following Jesus is not just a Sunday thing, it’s a Monday thing, Funday thing, Sad-day thing, Saturday thing and everything in between it’s every day who you are, not what you are.
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How do you get to the point where you can parent in a way that turns your kids hearts to Jesus – really adopting this way that works?
2 Quick tips to adjust your parenting to the way that works – turning every activity into an object lesson about God:
1. It starts with your relationship with God – getting it red hot.
b
“If you want them to bleed, you have to hemorrhage”
Practical Practices to put time into:
– Read & “Preach” the scripture
ILLUSTRATION:
When I first came to Jesus and started reading the scripture I did something that I didn’t know was more helpful than anything else. I would preach the passage I was reading.
- Pray like you believe in God
If you’re like me, you’re prayers can just become little things you toss up in the air, pray like you believe God cares and wants to be in relationship with you
- Seek Him throughout the day (play hide and seek)
I have to be careful here, God is not hiding from us – but Jesus said the Spirit of God is unpredictable, He’s like a wind that blows where He wants to
Be a sail that catches God’s wind instead of banner that gets ripped up when the wind blows…
2. Heal your relationships
“Your kid’s security is based on the strength of your relationship with your spouse, not your friendship with your child. If they go to sleep at night worried you will get a divorce, they will not hear anything you say about Jesus – and rightly so…”
ILLUSTRATION:
If you are a jerk to your wife, guess what, your kids aren’t going to believe you about Jesus. If you ignore your kids and family every night and are just on a device, your kids aren’t going to believe you about Jesus. If you you only ever complain about your husband your kids aren’t going to believe you about Jesus. Your kids security is based on the stability and strength of your relationship..
Practical Practices to put time into:
- Break down delusions and lies (what’s the narrative you’ve chosen to believe)
ILLUSTRATION:
I’ve seen more than ever women leaving their families because there is a narrative in our world that women are the only ones doing any work and that there is a “good life” out there that you are currently not experiencing. I’m not advocating staying in an abusive relationship.
Can I tell you what, the good life is not something you slip into, it’s something you work your butt off for and sometimes you’re the only one working for it.
Men, love your wife in a way that she believes she’s in the “good life” – pursue your wife in a way that is not self-serving – not so you can have sex with her, but so she knows she’s the most important thing to you.
-stop abandoning her to hang with your buddies
-Stop speaking to her like she’s second-rate
-Stop being lazy in your relationship – if you don’t know what to do, get the love dare book, or get around guys who do know
Women, speak the value you want to see in your husband over him
- thank him for the work he does – our world only says men are crap – we are expected to be Homer Simpson, call out the good you see in him every time you see it.
- hold his hand, look him in the eyes
- stop believing the lie that there is something better out there, and instead make better…
- Stop hiding the truth – tell one another how you feel even if it’s scary and then “Love, ask for forgiveness, forgive, serve” Rinse and repeat
- Go on dates with your spouse
“But Kent, what if nothing changes? What am I supposed to do then?”
You have no control over someone else, what you have control over is yourself – your job is to be committed to your family – your kids will see your heart for God and your family. Your spouse will see it – if they don’t give back to you, you have to learn from Jesus – He gave it all and was abused and killed for it and He prayed, Father forgive them, they know not what they’re doing. Jesus’ answer was in God and His relationship there, not in the sufficiency of his horizontal relationships…
CLOSING ILLUSTRATION:
See, I could tell you all the ways to talk about God and talk about how we do this as a family, which is helpful for sure, and maybe someday I’ll give those examples. But what I was thinking about was when you’ve experienced something yourself, you don’t have to think about how to share it with someone else. For instance, I doubt you ever had to coax Neil Armstrong to tell you what it was like to walk on the moon – because it was a defining factor for his life, your relationship with Jesus is the same.
This morning, Is your family, is your marriage, are your kids worth you becoming a person who is defined by Jesus? Take that step and come up here, confess it and move towards Jesus.
