What if our anger isn’t the problem, but how we use it is? Are we letting it lead us to sin, or using it to fight for others? Tune in this Sunday to find out!

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OPENING ILLUSTRATION:

I remember when I was in 6th grade our science teacher – Mr. Cronkite was trying to teach us to think outside of the box.  He said, like, if you are ever surrounded by a bunch of guys who want to get into a fight, you need to look for the person with the biggest weakness and go after it.  He then proceeded to tell us about a kid who got jumped after school and was surrounded by all these kids who were going to beat him up.  He saw that one of the kids had braces and he took Cronkite’s advice and he punched that kid in the mouth as hard as he possibly could!  Blood exploded from the boy’s mouth and all the other kids ran of terrified about what would happen to them…

Needless to say, Mr. Cronkite was all the boys’ favorite teacher after that…

But he had a point, right, 

Usually, the one who wins a fight is the one who fights the dirtiest…

Today we are starting this series, 

FIGHT

learning to handle conflict (the healthy way)

I’m going to give you the boring stuff – Cronkite knew how to make it exciting, but my goal isn’t for you to learn to win fights, but how to go an entirely different route over the next few weeks…

Especially coming out of this series on relationships…

So, today we are going to look at when anger is a good thing, and when it’s not so much

Let me ask you a question, 

How many of you struggle with anger?

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Better yet, how many of you would those close to you say you can be an angry person?

ILLUSTRATION:

I asked my kids this and they were like, “no dad, you’re not.”  But I know that’s not always true…  The reality is, just like you, I have times where I’m angry and where I explode…

Today I want to look at when it’s ok to be angry and when it’s not.

CAVEAT:

Here’s my worry with this sermon is that not everyone who is angry actually knows they are angry.  Some of you have just accepted it as part of who you are.  

Here’s how to know if you have a problem with anger.  

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Ask yourself this question, “If I had a boss who talked to me the way I talk to __(your spouse, kids, employees, etc)_.  Would I put up with it?”

If you’re really brave, ask your loved ones if they think you are an angry person, but be prepared and give them 100% immunity from any repercussions – because if you are an angry person, I promise you, they are going to be scared to share that with you…

The reason I’m preaching this sermon is because if you are someone who struggles with anger, you need to learn when it’s appropriate and when it’s not.  In the coming weeks we are going to look at better ways to handle anger, but today, I want you to know not all anger is bad…

I think there are at least two types of anger, Righteous Anger & Danger Anger

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Danger anger is when you react with anger that’s inappropriate to the situation

-This is when your spouse burns the dinner and you rage at them.

-This is when your kid leaves a trail of toys, going from one play session to another and you blow up at them

-This is when you lock yourself of out of the house and get in the car beating on the steering wheel and cussing up a storm

-You shut down and go into violent silent weaponizing withdrawal 

Danger anger comes when your well-being feels threatened BUT no real harm occurs.

Look at this list of things that are often times underlying emotions that are presenting themselves as anger:

• guilt
• insecurity
• worn out
• confusion
• pain
• overwhelmed
• anxiety
• embarrassment
• rejection
• trauma
• threatened
• grief
• unfairness
• loneliness
• jealousy
• hunger
• helplessness
• stressed
• disappointment
• sadness

Paul’s challenge to us is:

Ephesians 4:26-27

26 “In your anger do not sin”[d]: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 

Anger is a means to control what feels out of control, when you power up you put yourself in a position to feel protected…

But so often it ends up being sinful.  You say things that hurt, you do things that break down others.  

Paul’s not saying to “don’t be angry,” what he’s saying is to not let your anger lead to sin – deal with it before it’s too late.

One of the things that challenges me is in the first chapter of Isaiah…

God tells Isaiah He’s done with all the religious things the people are bringing to Him, he sees them all as worthless, and here’s why:

Isaiah 1:15

¹⁵ When you spread out your hands in prayer,   I hide my eyes from you; even when you offer many prayers,   I am not listening. Your hands are full of blood!

He’s done with them because of the violence they perpetrated.  Later He will say:

¹⁷ Learn to do right; seek justice.  Defend the oppressed.^[a] Take up the cause of the fatherless; plead the case of the widow.

What do you do?  You need to start asking yourself

“What was that about?”

You need to start identifying what is actually driving your anger and deal with that – communicate it to those around you who are experiencing your outbursts.  “I’m sorry, I’m just feeling so anxious right now” or “I’m sorry, I’m just feel like I’m no good at this and it ticks me off and I get so angry”…

What would it look like if you started to take your anger a different direction.

God has given you a passionate personality, and there is definitely a place for anger to make a difference!

b

Righteous anger is when real harm is done to you or others – it’s an appropriate response to what’s happening

What would it look like for you to take your anger and use it to help others?  

To turn your passion to protecting those who have no one to protect them?

Jesus felt this kind of anger, listen to Mark

Mark 3:4-6

⁴ Then Jesus asked them, “Which is lawful on the Sabbath: to do good or to do evil, to save life or to kill?” But they remained silent.

⁵ He looked around at them in anger and, deeply distressed at their stubborn hearts, said to the man, “Stretch out your hand.” He stretched it out, and his hand was completely restored. ⁶ Then the Pharisees went out and began to plot with the Herodians how they might kill Jesus.

Jesus sees these religious guys who are willing to let this guy go unhealed in order to keep their laws and Jesus breaks the religious law to rescue this guy.

CLOSING ILLUSTRATION:

As disciples of Jesus, we need some people who will care so much for others that they will let themselves get riled up for injustice – and it’s fine to do that at a governmental level – I know so many of you get politically riled up, but what about the fatherless around us?  What about those who are dying apart from Jesus right now?  What about those who have no hope in this world?  Do you get angry for those who are being taken advantage of?  Do you get angry for the kids in foster care?  What about the single mom working 3 jobs?  What would it look like for you to turn your passionate personality into a response to help them?

[Anthony – After the invitation song, I’d like to end with you saying, we want to introduce you to a way that you could put your righteous anger to use, watch this video and then when you exit today stop and talk to someone from Transform Scott County by https://drive.google.com/file/d/1O3rjPTS9YPjoTBJyI826dtZ5y3cfee64]

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